“Things are not always perfect between us, but you’re still the only valentine for me… Dear Daddy, Happy Valentine’s Day! I love you, Mariel”
And so goes my last Valentine card from my love– Mariel. It was one I discovered serendipitously while running through her things after her passing. She kept every little memento between us, and now I can only treasure this one for as long as I live. I do believe it was Mariel reaching out across time and space to me.
Mariel was never overly sentimental about anything, or at least she did not display her feelings for the world to see, unlike me. Oftentimes, instead of blurting out “i- love- yous”, she would much rather remind me about watching my diet , lest I get another one of my gout attacks, or buy me another nice shirt. That was her way of telling me how much she cared for me, And that was my wife Mariel’s way of showing, how deeply she had loved me. I’m sure she knew too how much I loved her deeply. And it goes without saying that she will always be my one true valentine.
By the way, Sam and I have some special cards for you today Mommy, be sure to read them please. And always remember that you will forever be in our hearts. And that we longingly wait for the day that we can be all together again, and share our love through eternity. We love you so very, very, very much. Happy Valentine’s Day, Mommy.
Mariel's Garden 
Love shows itself in many ways. Her care for your health meant just as much, if not more, I’m sure that other ways of saying I Love You. Make sure you are taking good care of yourself now that she’s gone. It must be hard, but it’s important.
That’s marvellously expressed, Bong. It’s painful and sadly that’s really how it’s going to be, today.
You’ll treasure those cards, both from and to Mariel.
And you’re right – love shows itself in so many unconventional and unexpected ways. Even telling you to lay off your favourite food. Maybe even especially that.
Nagging, talking constantly, arguing, even fighting sometimes – there are so many signs of a living relationship all day long, and all night, too.
Yes Writinggb, It’s quite ironic that I seem to be taking care of myself more now because I do it for Mariel now and its something that i know will make her happy. And she’s counting on me to stay for a while more for our daughter Sam who still quite young. I still miss her all the time but today’s another one of those…
By the way, I went to her memorial place at Heritage Park today and brought her some red, red roses. She loved flowers and I know she was pleased. I know too that she still looking after me and my diet, maybe nudging me from time to time if I’d forget.
Thank you and I wish you and those you love a Happy Valentine’s Day.
Hi Robert,
I’d give up anything in this world to get even a little of the nagging, arguing and even fighting back. But we both know that things can never really be the same.
Although I received an honest-to-goodness treat from Mariel today. Because, just when I was about get into my car to go to work this morning, a beautiful butterfly with white, black and LILAC wings buzzed me. (Most of us know Mariel’s favorite lilac color). It swirled around me for about a minute. And I was sure it was Mariel’s way of greeting me, Happy Valentine’s today. I prayed so hard last night for even a small sign even taunting her to play with the blog numbers while I was writing. But I got something a little bit more comforting. For sure, she was telling me that she loves me and again reminding me STILL to keep to my diet. I really love her so much.
May your day be filled only with joy and laughter. Have a fun Valentine’s Day today from Mariel and me.
Take care,
Bong
Hi again,
I’m glad that you found some joy today, even if just a little – and thanks for your kind words over on my site, too.
I hope you don’t mind, but since you were in my mind this morning, Bong, I re-read my comment on your post Sundays with Sam and adapted it to make a whole post.
My thoughts emerged very late that evening in response to yours, half a world away. But they serve to sum up a lot of what I think about the grieving process, and the hope I can see in your future.
Here it is then, especially for you: Hope on Valentine’s Day – the distant light.
All best wishes to you from London. And …
… spirits up !
Thanks Robert for giving us something to hope for. No matter how unreachable and distant the horizon would seem right now.
Spirits up too.
Bong,
Today is a day for people in love. Charito and I celebrate this special day with you, Mariel & Sam.
We keep you in our prayers, so even if you are not able to touch each one today, you still keep the love that has made your relationship worth celebrating Valentine’s Day for. Mariel will keep loving you and Sam. May you keep that love, as a choice, rather than an obligation. May that love fuel your every morning. May that love help untangle your sometimes difficult days. May that love grow and flourish from within you and extend outward to those Mariel would otherwise have wanted to reach, the poor and underpriviledged around us, the misunderstood and unloved, the abused, and most specially to those who have forgotten how it is to love.
In the meantime, that Mariel awaits you, keep and hold on to the other leg of the tripod your union has been created from, the Lord. He has kept you and will keep you.
Together with Sam, celebrate this marvelous day.
God bless you always,
Wally & Charito
Hope you’re OK.
Hi Robert,
Thanks for caring. I’m ok now although I went through another dip again over the weekend. You know how it goes.
I’ve been worried too lately about Sam who seems to be grieving in a far different way than I do. She seems to want to avoid confronting our new situation while I on the other hand seem to want to constantly dwell on it. Of course, I will do everything to help her now. She’s all I’ve got and Mariel’s counting on me to do the right things for her.
Take care too and I hope to see you someday in better times.
All the best,
Bong
Pingback: Letter to Mariel, February 29, 2008 « Mariel’s Garden