Midway To Nowhere

Mariel with Baby Sam

It’s been exactly six months since Mariel left for God’s garden. It’s what some would see as a midpoint in the yearlong “mourning period”. People tend to create these milestones as if we operated like mechanical clocks. I hope he wont mind, but if I may quote a friend, Robert of the price of love blog– “the calendar brings no release. New seasons, birthdays, anniversaries, family reunions, Christmas – we don’t want to see any of them, but they come round relentlessly all the same.”

I see it myself as midway to nowhere. For nothing yet has managed to fill in the gaping void that Mariel’s absence had left. She is immensely missed for the love, beauty and gentleness she had brought into our lives. Samantha and I must now try to do our best to “limp on” through the life’s uncertainties. We’ve gotten a little “better” at it these past months, but we still have a long way to go. We know however that the pain and emptiness we still feel today will probably remain with us till we can see Mommy once again.

Mariel our love, we you will forever remain in our hearts. You are the ‘compass” that we hope will someday get us out of this abyss into the light of God’s love. We love you always.

(Mariel loved this song from Nat and Natalie Cole. I wish to play this one for her tonight.)

6 thoughts on “Midway To Nowhere

  1. writinggb

    Yes, the calendar does not dictate our feelings, does it? We continue to feel the loss. The hole left by the death of a loved one is real.

    I hope you don’t feel that you are somehow supposed to feel a certain way because of the calendar. You are who you are and you feel what you feel. It’s okay.

    Hang in there!

  2. Yes Writinggb, feelings of loss show no respect for dates or the calendar. It comes whenever it wishes and without any warning. I know however that Mariel would have not allowed either to dictate how she felt or what she needed to do. I wish I had her or your Grandma’s great resolve. I just do my best to carry on for Mariel and Sam now.

    Thank you for making the pain a little more bearable. God bless you in your own journey.

    All the best to you always.

  3. Apple

    Hello, Bong and Sam

    Happy Easter. How are you doing?

    We went to Busch Gardens for Easter break. Everyone enjoyed themselves. There were 17 of us- Frank’s cousin’s family came too. They tagged us along with them, not a bad idea.

    What did you do for Easter? It is summer time now in Manila. Do you any plans of coming over to the US, if you do, please come and visit us here in Virginia.

    Take care always.
    Love,

    Apple and family

  4. Thanks Apple, Easter was spent at home.We however had a nice lunch get-together with Baguie’s family.Of course Alma and Mama was there with us.

    I’m in Vietnam now for a couple of days. Thanks for the invitation, we will surely see you if we ever get the chance to travel to the east coast. Take care and God bless your family.

  5. You can use that quote whenever you wish. It can’t ease the pain, but I hope it does help, just a little, to understand that other people have felt this way too.

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